Pray
If one more person tells me, “ All you have to do is pray more and God will take away your depression” I will drop-kick that person in the face. And I fully expect you to do the same. I will say it, YOU. CANNOT. PRAY. AWAY. DEPRESSION! Just like you cannot pray away cancer or a stomach ulcer or a migraine! Don’t get me wrong, I do believe in miracles! I believe beyond a doubt that if the Creator of the universe wanted to heal anyone of us from anything He could, BUT then where would our witness to God be? Here is where I give you some homework when you can. Read the book of Job in the old testament. If you don’t want to, here is a quick synopsis:
God gave permission to Satan to ‘test” Job. So He did. He (Satan) took everything! Job’s livelihood, his family, his heath, and the end, Job did not turn away from God. It is important to pray because when we’re face to face with our Creator, God, who loves each and every one of us more than we can ever imagine, we can see who we are. We can see why He has created us. It’s not easy though! It is not easy to give Jesus praise in the middle of the suffering! It gives me hope! It reminds me that I am not alone! I am NEVER alone. So, your prayers might be simple and might be broken. Mine have been, still are! And, He wants those prayers too. When we pray we are reminded of the Creator’s love for us and our place in the creation of the world. So. If you can, pray. If you can’t, just try.
Call out sick.
Unfortunately, I and many of my peers feel the need to constantly be working. If we are not working at our actual day job, we are working on side projects (such as this one), we are volunteering, or working on a side hustle that will lead us to be financially independent and no longer have a need for the boss or the 9-5. But the reality is that we are just going and going and going because somewhere along the line we started to believe this lie that we can’t call out, we can't take a moment for ourselves because we are so self-centered to believe that only I can do the task at hand! And I am here to tell you that this is a LIE! And if you don’t take care of yourself and call out even if you are “sick” you will become sick and you will not be able to contribute to ANY of your projects in any capacity. I remember the first time I called out sick when I was not physically ill. I was nervous out of my mind. My heart was in my stomach and my stomach was where my heart should be. I was a mess! But I was also stressed and you guessed it, it was in the middle of winter, my peak time for SAD. I went into my boss’s office to inform him. Notice, I did not ask for permission to take PTO. I had the time and I knew what I needed but because I have been so conditioned to just keep going… I almost broke into tears! Granted this was not the best employer and I would not wish anyone to have the boss I had. At any rate, I told him I would not be in and was taking a PTO day. He asked if I was sick… my scared brain blurted NO, I just need a mental health day! In his head, I was probably taking a spa day and drinking mimosas. When in actuality I cried all day, ate junk food, and cuddled my dog. I don’t have days like this one often but I knew my other option was to have a mental breakdown in the office… which has also happened! I just needed a day away! Away from Insatgram, away from the “ Hello Mari speaking,” away from everyone living their best life while I am barely able to smile. And I will tell you it takes guts! I was afraid of the repercussions I was afraid to let my people down! But I have learned the very hard way that if I don’t take the day- it turns into weeks and even months of an unproductive, slightly annoyed and very unhappy Marielena. And no one wants that. So take the time. Disertment is key in giving yourself the space to thrive and recharge.
Until next time,
Stay Hydrated, take your vitamins and be Kind!
Love,
Marielena